Selfless Self-Preservation for Mental Health

Taking care of yourself for the sake of God

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

I’ve been thinking too much these days about the difficulties of living with mental health challenges. I don’t recommend it. Some topics you choose and some topics choose you. If you have been worn out by this focus on mental health, I apologize. I will return to my wider interests as soon as I can gather myself. Until then, I would encourage you to become a paid subscriber if you can manage it. I could use the support and encouragement. It really does justify the considerable time I put into this writing.

What interests me today is the question of how to properly care for yourself when your mental health is declining or stagnant. Many people will tell you to “take care of yourself” or to “practice self-care.” Other, less sympathetic people in your life may tell you to “pull yourself together” or “get over it” or “stop thinking about yourself so much.” I think that most of the time people in both groups mean well, but our minds just aren’t as simple as all that. If you are mentally stuck, you can’t just “pull yourself together.” If you could, you would have done so already! And while there’s wisdom in not thinking about yourself too much (which can lead to more anxiety and obsessive thoughts), stopping that behavior is not as simple as just hearing someone say “stop!” Moreover, it’s not always clear what it means to “take care” of ourselves. It feels selfish and self-absorbed to be pampering ourselves while we neglect our other responsibilities. Is “retail therapy” a form of self-care? How is that healthy? And yet when you are in the thick of it you know that you have to slow down and do some triage. You can’t just keep striving and wrestling with the burden you’re struggling under. You need some kind of meaningful rest from your effort so that you can heal enough to move forward in a healthy way. So what does it look like to truly care for yourself when you are in the midst of a mental health spiral? I’d like to recommend the idea of “selfless self-preservation.”